Life is busy, right? It’s basically the whole premise of this blog series! How we’re busy yet still need to make the conscious effort to find time and ways to bond with our children. The key word is conscious. We have to purposefully make time to ensure we are providing opportunities and acting in a way that creates bonds with our children.
Likewise, we have to consciously listen to our children and show it. There is always something more we could be doing, but we can not let it be at the expense of listening to our children. We can not continuously say through our actions that what they have to say is not important. Ultimately, we are telling them they are not important!
It’s hard! I understand it completely with a house of four children, a dog and a husband, I often feel as if someone (or something!) wants to talk to me every minute of every day. Sometimes I simply want to be immersed in my book without discussion or washing dishes listening only to the plip plop of the water droplets. Sometimes I just want to be left alone.
Unfortunately, our children don’t quite understand that desire and in our attempts to be left alone, all they see, feel and hear is rejection. When we don’t actively listen to our children, we’re encouraging an attitude of unworthiness.
We can encourage an attitude of worthiness and confidence by listening when our children speak. By putting our phones down, stopping what we’re doing and making eye contact with our children, we are reiterating that what they have to say is worth listening to and important. Even when it’s not actually important to us, it is still important to them. Embrace what they love, encouraging their passions.
Children will do what they see and when they see us listening to them and showing it, they will be more apt to actively listen to others. Model this to your children, building their confidence and self-worth while simultaneously instilling positive future behaviors.